I had a feeling after a first week of successful blogging (woo!), there would be a slump.
It happens sometimes–often. There are days when I can’t think of anything to say or days when I find the internet disheartening.
Not so this time. This time, I had the best possible reason to be away from blogging.
Yes, I’m a complete introvert and something of a hermit. One of the reasons I’m trying this unconventional employment thing is because I really like living in the country. It’s peaceful. I aspire to be a peaceful person. And most days, I prefer solitude.
But I also straight up love people.
It’s a guarded kind of love. People have the potential to be hurtful or toxic or even physical threats. And like most introverts, I get overwhelmed and overstimulated if I’m not careful.
Over the past ten days or so, I’ve had a lot of interaction, which means I’m really digging some solitary time right now. But it was worth it. I’ve gotten to see friends from childhood, college, and grad school. I visited my brother and his wife, who have embarked on a new journey of their own down south. We went to a college football game, which aside from being raucous and fun was also a fascinating anthropological study (tribalism lives!). I saw some of my MFA classmates while we were down there. I continue to find them incredibly energizing and inspiring.
I suppose in an ideal world, interactions wouldn’t take time away from my daily personal goals, but of course they do. They must. I’ve been thinking lately that everything we do is a compromise. This “have it all” mentality we seem immersed in is obvious bullshit. When I choose one activity (like blogging today), I sacrifice another (an extra job application). I can adjust, I can juggle, but at the end of the day, I’m probably not going to be able to learn Japanese, run a marathon every month, earn three more degrees, have two jobs, and maintain a thriving social life.
What we don’t hear enough is: that is okay. Sometimes you have to choose. It might mean skipping or postponing a weekly run. Not taking that extra class. Not working until midnight every night.
And yes, obviously if we dropped everything whenever we had an opportunity to see an old friend or make a new one, we wouldn’t accomplish very much at all. Moreover, some people take a lot of unnecessary energy; some of them, as acknowledged, are not very good for us. Sometimes you have to say no–and you should.
And other times, you should say yes.
Because if we don’t make time for each other . . . what’s the point?
Who have you made time for lately?